Emotional Support Sisters

I thought I would give you all a little update. Since my post about intrusive thoughts, I decided it was time to go to therapy. The more I researched OCD and intrusive thoughts, the more I suspected that I had OCD. I made an appointment with my primary care physician and he referred me to a therapist. I have not been officially diagnosed with OCD, but in therapy we talked about the symptoms of OCD I do have and how to cope with them. 

I have gone to therapy in the past for anxiety, but this was different. I had to open up on a whole new level to discuss the types of intrusive thoughts I’ve been having and how it has affected my life for years. I have been doing a lot better in the short time we’ve been meeting. In fact, my therapist and I decided just this week that I didn’t need any more sessions for now! I want to share the four things from therapy that have helped me the most.

1. Self-compassion: one thing we did is pretend that someone I love was struggling with intrusive thoughts and what I would say to them. I had a lot more compassion for that person than myself. Verbalizing what I would say to them helped me internalize that compassion and apply it better to myself
2. Being aware of my thoughts and remembering that they are just thoughts. In my life/culture/religion I have been taught through scripture that even someone’s thoughts can be sinful. While I believe this to be true in some cases I also believe that I need to give myself some grace and remember that this is coming from an illness. I don’t have control over the intrusive thoughts that come into my head, but I do have control of what I do about them. I do not enjoy the thoughts or want to act on them in any way shape or form, and I wish I didn’t have them in the first place.
3. To go along with #2, my therapist pointed out that these intrusive thoughts often go against my values. Once I saw that pattern, it helped me form an inner dialogue. I would ask myself, “why is this intrusive thought so bothersome? What do I care about so deeply that when this thought pops up it bothers me so much?”

In conclusion, if you feel like you need therapy, do it. If you’re not sure where to start, just go to your general doctor and they should take it from there.